sleepless

That last post was kind of depressing so here's a related comic I found to lighten the mood :) I found it at this site http://www.phdcomics.com/comics/archive.php?comicid=1079
Enjoy!

To Sleep Perchance to Dream

I think we all can agree that sleep is pretty awesome. It renews us, it provides us with inspiration, but what about when it evades us? It's almost 5am here in Canada and I am still awake - tired, but awake. I've always had a love/hate relationship with sleep. When I was a kid I hated to go to bed but who doesn't actually love to sleep - I loved to sleep then and I still love to sleep but I'm not sure how very fond sleep is of me.
In December I finally got tired of my sleepless nights and decided to go and speak to a doctor about my problem. I was then formally diagnosed with insomnia and very luckily managed to get an appointment at a sleep clinic a few days later.
That was an interesting experience I can tell you - hooked up to all those wires....you'd think that would make it even more difficult to sleep but remarkably I did sleep that night.
However, it is now months later and I'm still waiting to hear the results of that sleep test and I am still having enormous trouble sleeping at night. I feel like I'm being driven ever-so-slowly mad.
It's very frustrating. I should explain though I can sleep - just not at night. I usually end up nodding off around 7 or 8am and sleeping well into the afternoon. As you might expect this rather interrupts my life - especially those 9am classes.
Still more frustrating though is the information out there about sleep. Stumbling on the internet I've read article after article talking about good sleep hygiene - about how you should only use your bed for sleep and sex and that you should have nothing in your room except what you need to sleep - no distractions around you. And I can't help wondering if good sleep isn't a luxury of the wealthy. My apartment has a bedroom, a kitchen, and a bathroom - I live in my bed and we can't afford anything bigger at the moment. So now what?
Well then the next question they ask is what keeps you up at night? Worries? Well, you must do away with those, pesky things you know - believe me, if I could live a worry free life I would but that's not likely to happen. So they tell you to de-stress before you go to bed and all manner of other things. Don't drink pop for at least 8 hours before you go to bed and nothing sweet....
I'm complaining now I think but I am so tired.
Anyways, I did come across one interesting article though from the perspective of another night owl. It discussed the idea that not all of humanity is necessarily hard-wired for the day time. Isn't it possible that some people are meant to be awake at night? And this got me to thinking about how much society really has an influence on our lives. How many people live in this sort of haze because they're trying to conform to normal standards of living? I wonder. Nevermind though, just the ramblings of a very sleepy woman. I think I'll try and entice sleep to come and pay me a visit. Nighty night for now.

Nine Lives Indeed

For whatever reason, cats seem to be blessed with outrageous luck and our cat Bagheera is no exception. Today, for the second time in about a month he jumped on top of my computer monitor only to fall off and have the monitor come tumbling down after him - it is a very heavy monitor! Both times I was sure Bagheera was about to be crushed to death or severely injured and both times a black blur whizzed by mere nanoseconds after the monitor hit the ground. Asides from a tail that was now twice its size - Bagheera really didn't appear any different - and that's the miracle of the cat.
I never really understood about the myth of cats having 9 lives but I think I get it now - and I think Bagheera's used up two of his. When I was a kid I used to think this myth was talking about reincarnation but now I think it's really referring to those close-calls so typical of a cat. But it got me to thinking about some of my own close-calls - those heart-stopping moments when everybody holds their breath - how many lives have I used up? How many lives do I have left? At least a cat knows their numbers.
"Luck never gives; it only lends"

Introducing the King Hellion

Wanted: Bagheera

Crimes: too many to list ... and they'll give you nightmares

Favourite Hobbies: eating toes, swiping at hands that innocently dangle over the edge of the bed, stalking the dog, owning the dog in "play" fighting, violently commandeering the laundry basket

Most likely to be found in any location he is forbidden to go including the bathroom, the laundry basket, the linen pile, on top of the computer, on top of the tv, and the list annoyingly continues

Weapons of choice: razor-sharp claws he insists on sharpening on wall-corners instead of his cat house and cat-tree and fangs to put a saber-toothed tiger to shame

Greatest weakness: an occasional desire to cuddle and involunatrily mewing cutely thereby forcing me to cuddle him

Most evil tendency: sneaking under the covers thereby slowing the speed of escape as he attacks the feet and legs of both Banana Number 2 and myself

Feel free to approach this cat and pet him but be weary - he tires of petting very quickly and new hands to maul are such a novelty

Introducing the Newest Little Hellion

Wanted: Loki

Crimes: Using the kitchen as his personal toilet

Favourite Hobbies: chasing snowballs which magically disappear when they hit the ground, jumping into the air and trying to eat giant snowflakes, pulling the cat around by his tail

Most likely to be found in Banana Number 2's spot in the bed - even if he just got up for a second

Weapons of choice: whining and "puppy-dog eyes"

Greatest weakness: an unquenchable love of cuddling

Please approach this dog with care since he is still weary of all strangers - especially snowmen and statues

A Look at My Island

So what follows is my first participation in a meme. Pauline from the blog Writing Down the Words asked me 5 interview questions which I answered (long-windedly :S maybe the next meme I'll be able to keep shorter). So here it is:

Question One: If you could land your dream job, what would it be?

Haha, this actually quite the complicated question to be asking a graduate in my opinion. Most of us have no idea what our dream jobs are - and we spend half our time thinking about it these days. We keep hearing from career counsellors and teachers and seemingly endless articles that you should love what you do - but what if what you love isn't exactly a money making venture? Well then the reply might be to do what you're good at - this isn't necessarily helpful either. I have a friend who's struggling with this predicament in her courses right now - she gets extremely high grades in one strand of courses but she prefers a different strand in which she gets much lower grades - so which should she focus on? Sometimes it isn't as simple as doing what you love.
But I'm digressing slightly. My dream job splits into 3 possibilities that I can't quite decide between. My ultimate dream job would be to be a professional writer - of fiction, fantasy literature in particular, although I also enjoy writing poetry. And what poet hasn't dreamed of the Griffin Poetry Prize or other prestigious awards - but all too often I get asked this question: that's nice dear, but what will your day job be? - thanks for the support. lol. As it happens though I think writing is something I'll always do - it's a passion and so for now I'll remove it from the list since it's always a possibility.
Which leads me to the other two dream options - owning an independent bookshop or starting my own publishing house. Are you seeing a theme yet? These two stem from naturally two different but highly related desires. The bookshop dream comes from my wish to share my love of reading with the world. There are 3 librarians in my family and I grew up with a never-ending supply of books to read. But what I consider equally special was that my Mum would take me with her when she went book-buying for her library (a high school library) and she'd let me help choose the books! Not only was this a glorious kid-in-the-candy-store experience but I loved the reward at the end of the experience - when she'd tell me that the books I chose were hardly ever in the library, that the kids loved them and were constantly taking them out. I'd love to do this for the rest of my life.
On the flip-side of this comes the desire to discover writers - to pick that story out of the pile that's really something and give it a chance - to make some writer's dream come true. Currently I'm leaning towards the bookstore dream job - I've begun researching what it takes to open up a bookstore but it'll take a lot of research before I finally decide - and it'll likely be several years before any of these dreams are possible - takes money to make money, so for now I'll stick to my writing - all it costs is a little time and commitment.

Question Two: What one person (living or not) has most influenced your life and how?

I know it might be a bit cliche but I honestly think the one person so far to have the biggest influence on my life has been my mother. She's a teacher librarian in a high school and not only did she provide me with an endless supply of books to read throughout my youth but she never censored what I read and she allowed me to help select the books for her library - enabling me to share my love of reading with others and instilling a life long passion for books and reading in me. Not only this but she showed me tremendous courage in our home life when I was growing up and when the time came she took us out of an unpleasant situation. I never doubted my mother's strength and resolve to live a good, honest life no matter what obstacles she was faced with. I only hope to have her wisdom, courage and strength when I'm her age.

Question Three: What are your own thoughts on alternate universes?

Haha - my thoughts on alternate universes change day by day. lol. But in all seriousness, I fully believe that there are other worlds existing out there, somewhere in the great beyond. How could there not be? It seems incredibly arrogant to believe that this earth is the only earth out there, the only planet or world with life in all the space beyond our small lighted window of this world. Wouldn't it be something fantastic if when you die instead of going nowhere, or to heaven or being reincarnated back on this earth you ended up in some other world in the universe? Until disproven as far as I'm concerned, all that the imagination can create exists in these alternate universes.

Question Four: What goals and aspirations do you have for the next ten years?

Heavens, ten years seems like a long time to me...and there are so many things I want to achieve within that time frame. If all goes well, I'll be good and graduated by the summer and sometime in the next two years I'll be married as well. And oh my, in the next ten years I hope to find a career that I can be passionate about, do something that I love, not every day, nobody loves their job every moment of every day, but one where I can be glad to go to work the following morning and start again. In my perfect world I'd have at least one book published by the time I'm thirty and be closer to my goal of opening up a bookshop. And family life? I'd like to start one! lol. I mean I have a family now, my fiance and myself, our dog Loki and cat Bagheera, but some little ones running around might be nice too - but not for a while. That's a lot of goals in 10 years and I have many more, but a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step - let mine begin with that first step towards the podium to accept my degree.

Question Five: If, as a requisite for your upcoming graduation, you had to write an inspiring speech, what would be your subject and why?

Hmm, that's a bit of a toughy, but I think I'd take a page out of President Obama's book and make my speech about our entering into an age of greatness. It is when times are most troubled and the world seems to be facing some of its greatest perils that the greatest deeds are done - and this is the future facing today's graduates - to rise up, face and overcome some of the greatest challenges the world has ever known. And I'm not speaking of war or other such passing perils - we'll always have war and they matter most to the people living in them but I'd argue they're quickly forgotten (relatively to the enormous span of human history). But there are some really interesting and new things facing us today - famine on a global scale, "global warming", nations seemingly completely unable to extricate themselves from each other's business. Some of these new challenges and problems are down right bizarre when you think about them - but they're there nonetheless. But on the other side of the scale is this vast expanse of possibility. This could be the time when the world makes some serious shifts. Maybe we will discover some new worlds, maybe nation-states will dissolve and form some new global community, who knows? But it's our world to discover and make new and that's the important point. "'T is not too late to seek a newer world." An age of greatness ahead...let's hope.

And that concludes the interview :D Hope you liked it.

Now, if you’d like to answer interview questions of my own devising:

1. Leave me a comment saying, "Interview me."
2. I will respond by emailing you five questions. (I get to pick what they will be.)
3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview
someone else.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask
them five questions.

Soap Bubbles and Umbilical Cords

Watch this interview - http://www.wimp.com/bigtheory/

It is by far and away one of the most interesting interviews I have ever seen in my life. It's an interview with Michio Kaku where he talks about the scientific possibilities of parallel universes and wormholes. Thankfully he explains it all in easily understandable terms. To summarize, he basically says that the soap bubble of our universe may not be the only soap bubble out there and that our little soap bubble may be connected to other soap bubbles by umbilical cords - sliders anyone?

And he explains how parallel universes exist in our very own living rooms - that they're pretty much hovering above us but that they are invisible because the light of our sun goes underneath them - so we cannot see them.

And I love how he comes to terms with the conflicts in his two religions - Christianity and Buddhism. He says that "Genesis takes place continually in an ocean of Nirvana" - such a beautiful image. He explains that Nirvana is timeless - no beginning or end as compared to the "let their be light" Genesis, but that this timeless Nirvana is continually giving birth to multiple Genesises, multiple soap bubbles.

The other thing that's pretty cool about this interview is that he pretty much answers that childhood question: where does the stuff that gets sucked into a black hole go? - where does all that matter go? And his answer fits in seamlessly with the rest of the theories he proposes. The matter comes out the other end of the black hole through what is called a white hole - and white holes expand very rapidly .... like the big bang .... or Genesis. "Let there be light!" and poof! there's all this stuff.

But what I really love about this interview is the grand possibilities of what he proposes - of these parallel worlds. I grew up on fantasy literature, myths and fairy tales. I spent my youth looking for Narnia in the back of closets and searching for hobbits around every other tree. This is what fascinates me most - that all of these things - all of these different worlds and different creatures are possible, they can exist somewhere, even if they may not exist in this world. I always believed this to be true, but now there's the science to back me up. So I will leave you with some lines from Alfred Lord Tennyson's poem Ulysses:

Yet all experience is an arch wherethro'
Gleams that untravell'd world whose margin fades
For ever and for ever when I move.
....

Come, my friends.
'T is not too late to seek a newer world.